The human body is the best sensor in the known universe. An external event will trigger a reaction in the body and you will feel this reaction as sensations. These sensations may cause pain or pleasure. Learn to track and observe these sensations with equanimity.
Reacting to an "external event" is actually a reaction to a sensation on the body. Therefore, anger and pleasure are not caused by external events, but are a response to a sensation on the body.
Over time this reaction becomes a habit resulting in action without thought. Develop the ability to track and observe the sensations with equanimity. Do not suppress the sensations (i.e. deal with reality), just observe with equanimity. Naturally, the deeper ingrained the habit, the harder it is to change it.
What if external events do not trigger a reaction and sensation? This is an indication of low emotional or social intelligence (and maybe other issues as well, such as a lack of compassion).
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